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Friday Inspiration - 12 June 2009
By Melissa Bult

Overcoming Rejection

Hello everyone, 

In order to decide on the topics for Friday Inspiration each week I practice awareness of the signs given to me by the Universe.  This week, I experienced not only my own issues with rejection, but I had two friends tell me about their struggles also.  So this week’s inspiration is about rejection.  

The idea of being rejected has always been one of my worst fears and yet surprisingly, it has not stopped me from walking paths less travelled.  If I worried about being rejected by society I would not be able to do my work!  My guess is that rejection is a fear also carried by many of you, so where does this fear come from?   

We filter the events that happen around us through our previous experiences and understanding, so we will find what we expect to in any given situation. 
On top of that, the world around us mirrors how we feel about ourselves, about life and the beliefs we have.  So if you believe or fear that you are not good enough, not loveable or do not belong, it is very likely you will experience a sense of rejection from certain situations. 

No one can actually reject you without your choosing to experience their actions as a rejection.  We will read into any situation what we think it means based on our filter system.  So if someone does not say hello to you in the morning you could see that as a rejection but it may just be that they were distracted and did not think to say anything.  We end up taking so much of life personally when really it is about the other person or circumstances and not about us.   

A friend of mine recently missed out on a job and was terribly upset, telling me she felt like a loser.  I told her that she was not meant to have that job, otherwise she would have it and not to take it personally.  Much of the time with relationships and situations in which things do not go the way we had hoped, we take it that we may have failed on some level or we were not good enough.  When really there could be many reasons including Universal ones such as it was not for your highest good to be in that job or that relationship.  

When we do feel that we have been rejected on some level it also provides us with an opportunity.  Ask yourself what you can learn and how you can grow from the experience.  There is always a deeper fear to explore when we are triggered by a so called ‘rejection’.  Once we work on these parts of ourselves we are less likely to let ourselves be severely knocked around when triggered by someone or something.  

It also comes back to the idea of like attracts like and so we need to explore the concept of self-rejection.  I know from experience that when I am not feeling good about myself that the world around me seems to mirror this back.  How can you expect others to accept you if you do not accept yourself?  Look at the parts of yourself that you are rejecting and work to heal these.  When you do not believe you are worthy of a good life you will unconsciously choose situations and relationships to prove to you exactly what you believe.   

I love the concept of ‘driving the bus’ – in life you are either driving the bus or you are letting it be driven.  When you are driving the bus you are free to choose how you want to act and re-act in life.  This does not mean dis-guarding your feelings but rather deciding how to respond to them.  You have the power to decide how you want to look at any situation, meaning you can decide not to take it as a rejection.  

When you do feel rejected the last thing you want to do is add to it by being hard on yourself.  More often that not it is not even about you personally and there is a bigger picture at play.  Choose to take the learning from all situations of this nature and use it to love yourself even more.   

From a spiritual point of view you are loved more than you could possibly imagine and will never be rejected by God (or whatever you like to call it).  When you really understand this and you can accept yourself rejection will no longer be as scary.  

Affirmation: ‘I love and accept myself, therefore I choose to love and accept others and all my relationships are harmonious.’  

Have a lovely day and be blessed. 

With love

Melissa x


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